Why You Should Retire from Struggle Culture: Choosing Ease When You’ve Earned It

By Black.By.Nature for The Blue Café Magazine

Somewhere along the way, we were taught that exhaustion was honorable. That staying busy meant you were doing something right. That the “hard life” was a rite of passage, especially for women—the badge of strength, the silent suffering, the emotional labor nobody sees but everybody expects.

But let’s be honest: struggle culture is tired—and so are we.

The hard life demands everything and gives very little back. It teaches you to wear burnout like a crown and overworking like a trophy. You start to believe that saying “yes” all the time means you’re valuable. That suffering is a sign of success. But the truth? That lifestyle will drain you dry, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally.

That’s why I believe in retiring from struggle culture—and replacing it with what I call earned ease.

The soft life doesn’t mean opting out of responsibilities or pretending problems don’t exist. It means knowing when to opt out of chaos. It means setting boundaries before burnout. It’s choosing calm over constant hustle. It’s understanding that choosing you doesn’t make you selfish—it makes you well.

The soft life looks like walking away from people who only love you when you’re useful. It looks like silencing your phone, protecting your space, and reclaiming your time without guilt. It’s rest as resistance. It’s saying “not today” to everything that used to steal your peace—and meaning it.